A naked baby flying around and shooting arrows at people isn’t an image of love. It’s more like a scene out of a horror movie.
I once told my wife that I preferred not to celebrate Valentine’s Day because the holiday actually dates back to a festival called Lupercalia in pagan Rome and it involved whipping women and engaging in some sort of sexual lottery. The next year, after my wife allowed me back into the bedroom, I brought her some flowers and chocolates.
Murphy at Law: The Power of Negative Thinking is available on Amazon. The premise for most of the jokes is Murphy’s Law and the setup is usually, You might be a Murphy if…
Here are a few Valentines Jokes from the chapter on sex and love.
You might be a Murphy if…
you see impotence as the answer to your sexual problems.
you try computer sex one time and your computer gets a virus.
a really beautiful woman falls madly in love with you and her ex-husband is a psychotic ultimate fighter who hasn’t quite gotten over her.
About 145 million valentine cards are purchased annually.
Women purchase 80%of all greeting cards.
When sugar and candy were rationed during World War II, flowers became the preeminent gift for Valentine’s Day.